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Be tender but don’t surrender

Be tender means being compassionate and understanding, not surrender means to maintain your boundaries. The title of today’s blog is well applied when someone does you wrong. The bible clearly cautions us about disappointments on last days as written in 2 Timothy 3: 1-5 “ But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God—having a form of godliness but denying its power…” And a statement that catches my attention is “ Have nothing to do with such people”.

How to overcome disappoints when engaging with people

as described in 2 Timothy 3: 1-5?

1.      Be kind and empathetic without allowing no one to compromise your values. It will require for you to understand the persons struggles and burdens so that you are not judgmental, however, stand still of your believes and don’t let them manipulate you.   

2.      Communicate your boundaries in a respectful manner. Clearly define what for you is acceptable or not, express your needs confidently, without being aggressive.

3.      Choose your battles. Not every situation requires your invested energy, sometimes is better to swallow and let go.

4.      Have a mental and physical self-care routine as this is critical to build your strength to handle challenges that life will bring, as we read in 2 Timothy 3: 1-5.

5.      Always do a lookback of not so pleasant interactions, learn from the experience by doing a self-reflection of what went well, what not, and how to improve next time. This helps refine your approach and ensure that your tenderness is not misunderstood with being weak.

Recommended study group (click on the picture below)

A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense” (Proverbs 19:11 NIV). The more you understand a person, their backgrounds, battles, and burdens, the easier is to be patient with him and to build strategies to avoid being manipulated by them.  


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